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Journey
Through the Light and Back

Mellen-Thomas
Benedict’s Near Death Experience
In 1982 I died from terminal cancer. The
condition I had was inoperable, and any kind of chemotherapy they could give me
would just have made me more of a vegetable. I was given six to eight months to
live. I had been an information freak in the1970’s, and I had become
increasingly despondent over the nuclear crisis, the ecology crisis, and so
forth. So, since I did not have a spiritual basis, I began to believe that
nature had made a mistake, and that we were probably a cancerous organism on the
planet. I saw no way that we could get out from all the problems we had created
for ourselves and the planet. I perceived all humans as cancer, and that is what
I got. That is what killed me. Be careful what your world view is. It can feed
back on you, especially if it is a negative world view. I had a seriously
negative one. That is what led me into my death. I tried all sorts of
alternative healing methods, but nothing helped.
So I determined that this was really
just between me and God. I had never really faced God before, or even dealt with
God. I was not into any kind of spirituality at the time, but I began a journey
into learning about spirituality and alternative healing. I set out to do all
the reading I could and bone up on the subject, because I did not want to be
surprised on the other side. So I started reading on various religions and
philosophies. They were all very interesting, and gave hope that there was
something on the other side. I ended up in hospice care.
I remember waking up one morning at home
about 4:30 AM, and I just knew that this was it. This was the day I was going to
die. So I called a few friends and said goodbye. I woke up my hospice caretaker
and told her. I had a private agreement with her that she would leave my dead
body alone for six hours, since I had read that all kinds of interesting things
happen when you die. I went back to sleep. The next thing I remember is the
beginning of a typical near death experience. Suddenly I was fully aware and I
was standing up, but my body was in the bed. There was this darkness around me.
Being out of my body was even more vivid than ordinary experience. It was so
vivid that I could see every room in the house, I could see the top of the
house, I could see around the house, I could see under the house.
There was this Light shining. I turned
toward the Light. The Light was very similar to what many other people have
described in their near death experiences. It was so magnificent. It is
tangible; you can feel it. It is alluring; you want to go to it like you would
want to go to your ideal mother’s or father’s arms. As I began to move toward
the Light, I knew intuitively that if I went to the Light, I would be dead. So
as I was moving toward the Light I said, “Please wait a minute, just hold on a
second here. I want to think about this; I would like to talk to you before I
go.” To my surprise, the entire experience halted at that point. You are indeed
in control of your near death experience. You are not on a roller coaster ride.
So my request was honored and I had some conversations with the Light. The Light
kept changing into different figures, like Jesus, Buddha, Krishna, mandalas,
archetypal images and signs. I asked the Light, “What is going on here? Please,
Light, clarify yourself for me. I really want to know the reality of the
situation.” I cannot really say the exact words, because it was sort of
telepathy. The Light responded. The information transferred to me was that
during your near death experience your beliefs shape the kind of feedback you
are getting before the Light. If you were a Buddhist or Catholic or
Fundamentalist, you get a feedback loop of your own stuff. You have a chance to
look at it and examine it, but most people do not. As the Light revealed itself
to me, I became aware that what I was really seeing was our higher Self matrix.
We all have a higher Self, or an oversoul part of our being. It revealed itself
to me in its truest energy form. The only way I can really describe it is that
the being of the higher Self is more like a conduit. It did not look like that,
but it is a direct connection to the Source that each and every one of us has.
We are directly connected to the Source. So the Light was showing me the higher
Self matrix. I was not committed to one particular religion. So that is what was
being fed back to me during my near death experience. As I asked the Light to
keep clearing for me, to keep explaining, I understood what the higher Self
matrix is. We have a grid around the planet where all the higher Selves are
connected. This is like a great company, a next subtle level of energy around
us, the spirit level, you might say. Then, after a couple of minutes, I asked
for more clarification. I really wanted to know what the universe is about, and
I was ready to go at that time. I said “I am ready, take me.” Then the Light
turned into the most beautiful thing that I have ever seen: a mandala of human
souls on this planet. Now I came to this with my negative view of what was
happening on the planet. So as I asked the Light to keep clarifying for me, I
saw in this magnificent mandala how beautiful we all are in our essence, our
core. We are the most beautiful creations. The human soul, the human matrix that
we all make together is absolutely fantastic, elegant, exotic, everything. I
just cannot say enough about how it changed my opinion of human beings in that
instant. I said, “Oh, God, I did not know how beautiful we are.” At any level,
high or low, in whatever shape you are in, you are the most beautiful creation,
you are.
The revelations coming from the Light
during my near death experience seemed to go on and on, then I asked the Light,
“Does this mean that Mankind will be saved?” Then, like a trumpet blast with a
shower of spiraling lights, the Great Light spoke, saying, “Remember this and
never forget; you save, redeem and heal yourself. You always have. You always
will. You were created with the power to do so from before the beginning of the
world.”
In that instant I realized even more. I
realized that WE HAVE ALREADY BEEN SAVED, and we saved ourselves because we were
designed to self¬-correct like the rest of God’s universe. This is what the
second coming is about. I thanked the Light of God with all my heart. The best
thing I could come up with during my near death experience was these simple
words of total appreciation: “Oh dear God, dear Universe, dear Great Self, I
Love My Life.” The Light seemed to breathe me in even more deeply. It was as if
the Light was completely absorbing me. The Love Light is, to this day,
indescribable. I entered into another realm, more profound than the last, and
became aware of something more, much more. It was an enormous stream of Light,
vast and full, deep in the Heart of Life. I asked what this was.
The Light responded, “This is the RIVER
OF LIFE. Drink of this manna water to your heart’s content.” So I did. I took
one big drink and then another. To drink of Life Itself! I was in ecstasy. Then
the Light said, “You have a desire.” The Light knew all about me, everything
past, present and future.
“Yes!” I whispered.
I asked to see the rest of the Universe;
beyond our solar system, beyond all human illusion. The Light then told me that
I could go with the Stream. I did, and was carried Through the Light at the End
of the Tunnel. I felt and heard a series of very soft sonic booms. What a rush!
Suddenly I seemed to be rocketing away
from the planet on this stream of Life. I saw the earth fly away. The solar
system, in all its splendor, whizzed by and disappeared. At faster than light
speed, I flew through the center of the galaxy, absorbing more knowledge as I
went. I learned that this galaxy, and all of the Universe, is bursting with many
different varieties of LIFE. I saw many worlds. The good news is that we are not
alone in this Universe! As I rode this stream of consciousness through the
center of the galaxy, the stream was expanding in awesome fractal waves of
energy. The super clusters of galaxies with all their ancient wisdom flew by. At
first I thought I was going somewhere; actually traveling. But then I realized
that, as the stream was expanding, my own consciousness was also expanding to
take in everything in the Universe! All creation passed by me. It was an
unimaginable wonder! I truly was a Wonder Child; a babe in Wonderland!
At this point of my near death
experience, I found myself in a profound stillness, beyond all silence. I could
see or perceive FOREVER, beyond Infinity.
I was in the Void.
I was in pre creation, before the Big
Bang. I had crossed over the beginning of time/the First Word/the First
vibration. I was in the Eye of Creation. I felt as if I was touching the Face of
God. It was not a religious feeling. Simply I was at one with Absolute Life and
Consciousness. When I say that I could see or perceive forever, I mean that I
could experience all of creation generating itself. It was without beginning and
without end. That’s a mind expanding thought, isn’t it? Scientists perceive the
Big Bang as a single event which created the Universe. I saw during my near
death experience that the Big Bang is only one of an infinite number of Big
Bangs creating Universes endlessly and simultaneously. The only images that even
come close in human terms would be those created by super computers using
fractal geometry equations.
The ancients knew of this. They said
Godhead periodically created new Universes by breathing out, and de created
other Universes by breathing in. These epochs were called Yugas. Modern science
called this the Big Bang. I was in absolute, pure consciousness. I could see or
perceive all the Big Bangs or Yugas creating and de creating themselves.
Instantly I entered into them all simultaneously. I saw that each and every
little piece of creation has the power to create. It is very difficult to try to
explain this. I am still speechless about this.
It took me years after I returned from
my near death experience to assimilate any words at all for the Void experience.
I can tell you this now: the Void is less than nothing, yet more than everything
that is! The Void is absolute zero; chaos forming all possibilities. It is
Absolute Consciousness; much more than even Universal Intelligence.
The Void is the vacuum or nothingness
between all physical manifestations. The SPACE between atoms and their
components. Modern science has begun to study this space between everything.
They call it Zero point. Whenever they try to measure it, their instruments go
off the scale, or to infinity, so to speak. They have no way, as of yet, to
measure infinity accurately. There is more of the 0 space in your own body and
the Universe than anything else!
What mystics call the Void is not a
void. It is so full of energy, a different kind of energy that has created
everything that we are. Everything since the Big Bang is vibration, from the
first Word, which is the first vibration. The biblical “I am” really has a
question mark after it. “I am—What am I?” So creation is God exploring God’s
Self through every way imaginable, in an ongoing, infinite exploration through
every one of us. I began to see during my near death experience that everything
that is, is the Self, literally, your Self, my Self. Everything is the great
Self. That is why God knows even when a leaf falls. That is possible because
wherever you are is the center of the universe. Wherever any atom is, that is
the center of the universe. There is God in that, and God in the Void.
As I was exploring the Void during my
near death experience and all the Yugas or creations, I was completely out of
time and space as we know it. In this expanded state, I discovered that creation
is about Absolute Pure Consciousness, or God, coming into the Experience of Life
as we know it. The Void itself is devoid of experience. It is pre life, before
the first vibration. Godhead is about more than Life and Death. Therefore there
is even more than Life and Death to experience in the Universe!
When I realized this during my near
death experience, I was finished with the Void, and wanted to return to this
creation, or Yuga. It just seemed like the natural thing to do. Then I suddenly
came back through the second Light, or the Big Bang, hearing several more velvet
booms. I rode the stream of consciousness back through all of creation, and what
a ride it was! The super clusters of galaxies came through me with even more
insights. I passed through the center of our galaxy, which is a black hole.
Black holes are the great processors or recyclers of the Universe. Do you know
what is on the other side of a Black Hole? We are; our galaxy, which has been
reprocessed from another Universe. In its total energy configuration, the galaxy
looked like a fantastic city of lights. All energy this side of the Big Bang is
light. Every sub atom, atom, star, planet, even consciousness itself is made of
light and has a frequency and/or particle. Light is living stuff. Everything is
made of light, even stones. So everything is alive. Everything is made from the
Light of God; everything is very intelligent.
As I rode the stream on and on, I could
eventually see a huge Light coming. I knew it was the First Light; the higher
Self Light Matrix of our solar system. Then the entire solar system appeared in
the Light, accompanied by one of those velvet booms.
I could see during my near death
experience all the energy that this solar system generates, and it is an
incredible light show! I could hear the Music of the Spheres. Our solar system,
as do all celestial bodies, generates a unique matrix of light, sound and
vibratory energies. Advanced civilizations from other star systems can spot life
as we know it in the universe by the vibratory or energy matrix imprint. It is
child’s play. The earth’s Wonder child (human beings) make an abundance of sound
right now, like children playing in the backyard of the universe.
The Light explained to me that there is
no death; we are immortal beings. We have already been alive forever! I realized
that we are part of a natural living system that recycles itself endlessly. I
was never told that I had to come back. I just knew that I would. It was only
natural, from what I had seen during my near death experience.
I don’t know how long I was with the
Light, in human time. But there came a moment when I realized that all my
questions had been answered and my return was near. When I say that all my
questions were answered on the other side, I mean to say just that. During my
near death experience, all my questions have been answered. Every human has a
different life and set of questions to explore. Some of our questions are
Universal, but each of us is exploring this thing we call Life in our own unique
way. So is every other form of life, from mountains to every leaf on every tree.
And that is very important to the rest
of us in this Universe. Because it all contributes to the Big Picture, the
fullness of Life. We are literally God exploring God’s self in an infinite Dance
of Life. Your uniqueness enhances all of Life.
As I began my return to the life cycle,
it never crossed my mind, nor was I told during my near death experience that I
would return to the same body. It just did not matter. I had complete trust in
the Light and the Life process. As the stream merged with the great Light, I
asked never to forget the revelations and the feelings of what I had learned on
the other side.
There was a “Yes.” It felt like a kiss
to my soul.
Then I was taken back through the Light
into the vibratory realm again. The whole process reversed, with even more
information being given to me. I came back home, and I was given lessons from my
near death experience on the mechanics of reincarnation. I was given answers to
all those little questions I had: “How does this work? How does that work?” I
knew that I would be reincarnated. The earth is a great processor of energy, and
individual consciousness evolves out of that into each one of us. I thought of
myself as a human for the first time, and I was happy to be that. From what I
have seen, I would be happy to be an atom in this universe. An atom. So to be
the human part of God ... this is the most fantastic blessing. It is a blessing
beyond our wildest estimation of what blessing can be. For each and every one of
us to be the human part of this experience is awesome, and magnificent. Each and
every one of us, no matter where we are, screwed up or not, is a blessing to the
planet, right where we are.
I went through the reincarnation process
expecting to be a baby somewhere. But I was given a lesson on how individual
identity and consciousness evolve. I was so surprised when I opened my eyes from
my near death experience. I do not know why, because I understood it, but it was
still such a surprise to be back in this body, back in my room with someone
looking over me crying her eyes out. It was my hospice caretaker. She had given
up an hour and a half after finding me dead. My body was stiff and inflexible.
She went into the other room. Then I awakened and saw the light outside. I tried
to get up to go to it, but I fell out of the bed. She heard a loud “clunk,” ran
in and found me on the floor.
When I recovered, I was very surprised
and yet very awed about what had happened to me during my near death experience.
At first all the memory of the trip that I have now was not there. I kept
slipping out of this world and kept asking, “Am I alive?” This world seemed more
like a dream than that one. Within three days I was feeling normal again,
clearer, yet different than I had ever felt in my life. My memory of my near
death experience came back later. I could see nothing wrong with any human being
I had ever seen. Before that I was really judgmental. I thought a lot of people
were really screwed up, in fact I thought that everybody was screwed up but me.
But I got clear on all that.
About three months later a friend said I
should get tested, so I went and got the scans and so forth. I really felt good,
so I was afraid of getting bad news. I remember the doctor at the clinic looking
at the before and after scans, saying, “Well, there is nothing here now.” I
said, “Really, it must be a miracle”’ He said “No, these things happen; they are
called spontaneous remission.” He acted very unimpressed. But here was a
miracle, and I was impressed, even if no one else was.
During my near death experience I had a
descent into what you might call Hell, and it was very surprising. I did not see
Satan or evil. My descent into Hell was a descent into each person’s customized
human misery, ignorance, and darkness of not knowing. It seemed like a miserable
eternity. But each of the millions of souls around me had a little star of light
always available. But no one seemed to pay attention to it. They were so
consumed with their own grief, trauma and misery. But, after what seemed an
eternity, I started calling out to that Light, like a child calling to a parent
for help. Then the Light opened up and formed a tunnel that came right to me and
insulated me from all that fear and pain, That is what Hell really is. So what
we are doing is learning to hold hands, to come together. The doors of Hell are
open now. We are going to link up, hold hands, and walk out of Hell together.
The Light came to me and turned into a huge golden angel. I said, “Are you the
angel of death?” It expressed to me that it was my oversoul, my higher Self
matrix, a super ancient part of ourselves. Then I was taken to the Light.
Soon our science will quantify spirit.
Isn’t that going to be wonderful? We are coming up with devices now that are
sensitive to subtle energy or spirit energy. Physicists use these atomic
colliders to smash atoms to see what they are made of. They have got it down to
quarks and charm, and all that. Well, one day they are going to come down to the
little thing that holds it all together, and they are going to have to call that
... God. We are just beginning to understand that we are creating too, as we go
along. As I saw forever, I came to a realm during my near death experience in
which there is a point where we pass all knowledge and begin creating the next
fractal, the next level. We have that power to create as we explore. And that is
God expanding itself through us.
Since my return I have experienced the
Light spontaneously, and I have learned how to get to that space almost any time
in my meditation. Each one of you can do this. You do not have to die or have a
near death experience to do this. It is within your equipment; you are wired for
it already. The body is the most magnificent Light being there is. The body is a
universe of incredible Light. Spirit is not pushing us to dissolve this body.
That is not what is happening. Stop trying to become God; God is becoming you.
Here.
I asked God: “What is the best religion
on the planet? Which one is right?” And Godhead said, with great love: “I don’t
care.” That was incredible grace. When Godhead said, “I don’t care,” I
immediately understood that it is for us to care about. It is important, because
we are the caring beings. It matters to us and that is where it is important.
What you have is the energy equation in spirituality. Ultimate Godhead does not
care if you are Protestant, Buddhist, or whatever. It is all a blooming facet of
the whole. I wish that all religions would realize it and let each other be. It
is not the end of each religion, but we are talking about the same God. Live and
let live. Each has a different view. And it all adds up to the big picture; it
is all important.
I went over to the other side during my
near death experience with a lot of fears about toxic waste, nuclear missiles,
the population explosion, the rainforest. I came back loving every single
problem. I love nuclear waste. I love the mushroom cloud; this is the holiest
mandala that we have manifested to date, as an archetype. It, more than any
religion or philosophy on earth, brought us together all of a sudden, to a new
level of consciousness. Knowing that maybe we can blow up the planet fifty
times, or 500 times, we finally realize that maybe we are all here together now.
For a period they had to keep setting off more bombs to get it in to us. Then we
started saying, “we do not need this any more.” Now we are actually in a safer
world than we have ever been in, and it is going to get safer. So I came back
from my near death experience loving toxic waste, because it brought us
together. These things are so big. As Peter Russell might say, these problems
are now “soul size.” Do we have soul size answers” YES!
The clearing of the rain forest will
slow down, and in fifty years there will be more trees on the planet than in a
long time. If you are into ecology, go for it; you are that part of the system
that is becoming aware. Go for it with all your might, but do not be depressed.
It is part of a larger thing. Earth is in the process of domesticating itself.
It is never again going to be as wild a place as it once was. There will be
great wild places, reserves where nature thrives. Gardening and reserves will be
the thing in the future. Population increase is getting very close to the
optimal range of energy to cause a shift in consciousness. That shift in
consciousness will change politics, money, energy.
After dying, going through my near death
experience and coming back, I really respect life and death. In our DNA
experiments we may have opened the door to a great secret. Soon we will be able
to live as long as we want to live in this body. After living 150 years or so,
there will be an intuitive soul sense that you will want to change channels.
Living forever in one body is not as creative as reincarnation, as transferring
energy in this fantastic vortex of energy that we are in. We are actually going
to see the wisdom of life and death, and enjoy it. As it is now, we have already
been alive forever. This body, that you are in, has been alive forever. It comes
from an unending stream of life, going back to the Big Bang and beyond. This
body gives life to the next life, in dense and subtle energy. This body has been
alive forever already.
Mellen Thomas Benedict is writing a book
and currently has available a series of audio CDs, beginning with “Journey
Through the Light and Back!”’ He is also available for lectures and workshops.
Copyright © 2005 Mellen-Thomas Benedict. All Rights
Reserved
Reproduced gratefully from:
http://www.mellen-thomas.com/stories.htm
Pictures were added by Gnostic
Liberation Front

Quotes from NDE Experts
P.M.H.
Atwater, Researcher and Author
of “Beyond the Light,” in which Mellen’s advanced skills are discussed.
“The near-death experience of Mellen-Thomas
is the only one I have yet come across where an individual willfully changed the
episode’s scenario as it was actually happening. what impresses me the most
about Mellen-Thomas is that he dedicated many years, not only to understanding
the phenomenon’s after effects, but to controlling and training his newly
expended psychic faculties. by opting for discipline instead of notoriety, and
keeping himself firmly grounded in the practicality of patented invention, he is
now emerging as a clear and steady voice… a solution finder… ready to tackle the
most vexing problems of the global community.”
Lee Pulos, Ph.D.,
Author of “Miracles and Other Realities,” Former President of the Canadian
Society of Clinical Hypnosis and Senior Psychologist to the Olympic Team Canada.
“Mellen is able, while in trance, to see
into microcosmic structures. although he maintains awareness in a hyper-alert
state, it is clear that he is able to simultaneously span several octaves of
consciousness, from which he can acquire biological information that is
extraordinary.”
Dr. Kenneth Ring,
Author of “Heading Toward Omega; The Omega Project”
“Mellen-Thomas has the big picture.”
“His story is one of the most remarkable I have encountered in extensive
research on near-death experiences. It is very rare that those who have died and
returned have seen into the future to the extent that Mellen has. His vision of
the future is one of hope. He has participated in studies of a Major University,
where he contributed to understanding the structure of genes and chromosome
coding for a genetic disease, while researchers puzzled over how he could have
access to this information.”
Dr. Janice Holden,
with the University of North Texas and president of International Association of
Near Death Studies (IANDS).
"Mellen-Thomas, under hypnosis, was able
to give accurate information about and draw the genetic makeup of a rare
neuromuscular disease. I was astounded by this. It’s not the kind of thing where
one could cheat."

The Potential Power of the Purified Mind
By Michael Goodspeed and Michael Armstrong
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